Wow, it's been several years since I've updated this blog. Not that I've forgotten it - indeed it seems like just a few months ago that I last wrote herein.
So much has transpired since then. Capped to First, transferred to Japan, four more deployments out to sea. The last two were as the LPO of the shop and my goodness what a joy and utter heartache that was, all at the same time. I'm grateful to have undergone it, and so glad it's over. Took the Chief's exam, and didn't make board. A blessing in disguise I assume. I had a really good LDO package ready for this year. Oh well.
I'm thirty three years old. I remember my mom being 33. I was ten. She was pregnant with my little brother Dave, number six. I'm still single, and generally content with that - not happy exactly, but content. I've lived many successful years being satisfied with content. Someday happiness will be mine. Fortunately for me, I have joy in my heart. A soul can go its entire life on the fruits of joy. Happiness is not necessary - it's merely a happening, a moment or sequence of moments in time that make our hearts swell to near bursting. The feeling is glorious and desirable, but without joy it fades quickly and the crash is terribly and woefully exhausting. So I can live without it I suppose... simply because it's not lasting. Joy is. Or rather it can be. There are times when I feel like even joy has deserted my poor heart. And on those days even I must admit to needing someone on whose shoulder I can rest my head... but no...
And speaking of my heart... well, let's just say that it beats a little stronger these days. It's been put through quite a series of strenuous workouts over the past several months. They say working out makes you strong. Well there you go.
And then, there's someone I want to tell you about... but maybe another time. It's a very long story that I actually have chronicled in a series of email that were sent and received during my last months of sea duty. Let it just suffice to be said that I rarely if ever write about someone, and this one... this one I'll write about. It's a story that I don't ever want to forget; even if it does end up breaking my heart down for good. That will be a rough day, and I pray that I don't see it (any time soon at least). *Le sigh*
One more hour until midnight... and then it's Sunday. The third Sunday in Lent. This Lent means a lot to me ♥
